Saving Tip #2: The Grocery Store

Nothing stresses me out more than grocery shopping! Planning the meals, making a list... that stuff is no
problem. But actually entering the grocery store, finding what I need, and getting out alive… That's a whole different story!

More than surviving the grocery store, how do you get in and out of there on budget?

(I shop weekly, but some people might find it easier to shop bi-weekly or monthly.)

• Step 1: Make a menu. 

The single most helpful thing I find when it comes to groceries is making a weekly menu. I will pick six or seven recipes that use similar ingredients. Like if I need to buy a random ingredient (such as cottage cheese or heavy whipping cream or kale), I will try to make sure it will be completely used up in all of my recipes. That way I am not wasting ingredients that I would not purchase regularly or cost a little more money. 

• Sometimes to save time, I will double a recipe so I don't have to cook the next night. Or pop it into the freezer and save for a rainy day!
• Once you make the menu, plan on sticking to it! You are going to spend the money on this food. Don't let it go to waste. 
• Look at your calendar. I can't tell you how many times I have planned a week's worth of food to find out that I wasn't going to be home three nights that week. 

• Step 2: Make a grocery list & shop your pantry.

Now that you have a menu, write down all of the ingredients that you will need to make those meals. But before you head to the store, check out what you have in pantry, refrigerator, or freezer. Don't buy parsley if it is already hanging out in your pantry.  I don't have the space or money to double up on ingredients that I won't be using that week. So I will just mark those ingredients off my list, then if they are already owned. 

• Step 3: Develop tunnel vision. 

One of the most repeated suggestions to saving money when grocery shopping is to not shop when you are hungry. Another common one is - stick to the list! Don't sabotage yourself by throwing tons of extra items that you don't need into the cart. Develop tunnel vision. Tell yourself you can only purchase the items on the list, so as you walk down the aisles, look only for those items. 

Coming soon: Next month I will have tips on saving on individual grocery items.

Dealing with the Social Media Explosion

The social media explosion is totally out of control!

The minute you have mastered one - a newer, better one shows up.

For parents who want to keep close tabs on their kids, the whole idea of social media may seem daunting. But if you establish some basic, manageable guidelines, it could be easier than you think. If you want your child to have access to their own device or internet profiles, please be careful.

Teenagers, if  your parents do not have guidelines set up for you, it would be very wise of you to follow these suggestions and offer this option to your parents. You shouldn't have anything to hide.

1. Be open. Social media isn't bad. It's a wonderful tool to connect with family, friends, and church family. Unfortunately people often forget to guard their tongues through the keyboard, like they would guard their tongue in every day life. It's an easy slope to fall down. But if your child is interested in joining the social media world, consider allowing it - rather than claming up and shutting your child down. It could be a great opportunity for you to give them some of that desperately desired "teenage" freedom, while at the same time monitoring them within your bubble.

2. Be choosy! There are seriously hundreds of social media sites and dozens of mainstream sites. Your teenager does not have to have every single one. Choose one or two that are very visible to you, but also secure for your child. Teach them responsibility with a smaller number. I would suggest allowing your child to have one site (such as Facebook) for several months, and if they have proven responsibility, they can use another site… if they are interested.

3. Be nosy! Require that your child provide you with passwords to all of their social media and email. No passwords - no social media - no technology. End of story. And here is the key: Log into their accounts! Check on them regularly.

You might think that just friending or following your child is enough. But unless you are actually logging into their accounts, you might not be seeing the whole story. Did you know that many sites have privacy settings that allow your teenager to block you if you are friends with them or follow them? Yes, that's right… Your child could share something with Best Friend 1 & Friend 2, and you would never know about it, unless you actually log into their account.

Photo Courtesy: http://www.pedalhouston.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/social_media_galore.rev2_.png

Book Review: The Book Thief

One of my new year's resolutions for 2014 is to read a new book every month. I absolutely love to read, but since I am a teacher, I don't often carve out time to read simply because it is something that I enjoy. The reality is I can crank through a book in a single day or by reading for a few hours every couple days. It shouldn't be that much of a struggle to read a book.

The book for January was The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. If you have heard about this book, you know that it was a wildly popular New York Times bestseller and should be coming out on DVD and Blu-ray pretty soon. The book is marketed as young adult fiction and appeals to teenagers and adults.

The setting appealed to me. 1940s Nazi Germany. (I am a history teacher after all…) And on top of the setting, it is about a Nazi German girl living in Nazi Germany who loves books. Sounds like a making of a bestseller to me.

The initial style of the book was confusing at best. It took several chapters to positively identify the narrator. He changed the subject frequently, rewinded the story or fast forwarded regularly. It was a lot like the natural flow of a conversation, but not at all what you expect from a book.

The story is almost exactly what the title states - a little girl, Nazi Germany, a book thief. In and of itself, it is a beautiful story about the people who fought for life and freedom and what's right during a difficult period of history. I certainly will not forget the story.

But as a Christian, I absolutely cannot recommend this book. It was vulgar. The language throughout was inappropriate at best. The adoptive mother of this little girl passed on her foul mouth to her daughter. The language was repeated on nearly every single page of the book. No, they weren't curse words, but I assure you that they were not words you want your children to repeat - in English or German. The beautiful and intriguing story doesn't redeem the filth you must wade through.

This book is being haled as a classic. It may in fact be. But that doesn't mean that we should read it, and I definitely do not believe in censoring classic literature for the sake of censorship. If you are a teenager interested in reading this book, please seek the permission of your parents first. Kindly ask them to read (or skim) through the book first and determine if they think the language is appropriate for you.

Photo Courtesy: Text added by me, http://christinajeter.com/books/you-are-going-to-die-does-this-worry-you-my-thoughts-on-the-book-thief/

Healthy Eating, Hard Choices

Let's play a game. Plate of steamed broccoli vs. Plate of delicious, warm chocolate chip cookies
Which do you want to choose? 

In the midst of my current weight loss life, this has suddenly become a really hard choice. If I wasn't concerned about tomorrow's weigh in, this wouldn't even be a blog post. I would be happily wolfing down a plate of warm, delicious chocolate chip cookies without a care in the world. And what a happy day it would be! 

Now here's the hard part, I am on that diet. I do happen to love broccoli.... Probably not as much as I love cookies, but I like broccoli. I know that it is good for me and it is the smart logical choice. The right choice... The hard choice.... I think in the end I would succumb to the cookies. Maybe not the whole plate, just a few. (Let's be honest, anyone who knows me, knows I am going for those cookies.)


Now lets play the same game with your two year old….

Which plate is your child going to choose?


It's ok to smile. We both know that kid wants the cookies. You probably knew that before your child chose.


Regardless of consequences, the overwhelming majority of us would probably choose the cookies and the person who offered us the choice probably knew too. Just like you knew what your kid would do.
Hmmm....


I've been offered a choice. The person who offered me the choice knew my answer before he even asked. I can consider the consequences for a lifetime or a moment. Chances are I am doing a head dive into those cookies. So why bother even offering? 


Because that someone loves me.
(It all boils down to love.)


God loves me.


He offered me a choice.


The pleasure of the world now or an eternity with Him.


He knew what I would choose before He offered it.

He knew what you would choose before He offered it.

He wants me to make the right choice because I want to. Not because I have to, not because I have no other choice, but because He loves me enough to let me make the choice on my own.

He knows what I am going to chose.


What have you chosen? Have you chosen a taste of the world, but now must bear the consequences for an eternity? Have you chosen to think long term and selected the healthy choice with eternal joy?


It may simple, but its the reality. You choose.

It is my prayer that you have chosen to spend eternity with Christ, now you are faced with a daily choice. Feed on a diet of Christ or feed on a diet of junk. The choice is still yours. God loves you, but I caution you to choose wisely.

~Deuteronomy 30:19-20~

I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live: That thou mayest love the Lord thy God, and that thou mayest obey his voice, and that thou mayest cleave unto him: for he is thy life, and the length of thy days: that thou mayest dwell in the land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.

Photo Courtesy: http://www.hoteljuliendubuque.com/index.php/enjoy-some-treats/4297589-plate-of-chocolate-chip-cookies-with-milk/

Helping the Husband

Prior to becoming a youth pastor’s wife, I was a full-time administrative assistant and a part-time school teacher, and a Sunday school teacher. My job, aside from teaching several classes, was to plan and organize and make my boss look good. I was used to having a big say in everything and it was my responsibility to see that it got done.

When we moved to Small Town, South, and my husband became a youth pastor, suddenly I found myself working a few hours a week doing odd jobs for the pastor. I was thankful for my job of course, because it meant our impossibly budget went from impossible to just tight (…and it gave me something to do). But I missed being needed and useful and having purpose.

The important thing for me to remember though was I had a new job – being a youth pastor’s wife. I was responsible to support to my husband’s ministry, as a representative of the church to the church and the community, and a wife. That’s a big job! 

Even though he isn't a youth pastor today (by choice, it's a long story), I can still help my husband in the same ways.

Here are some ways that I can help my husband:

1. Pray for him. 

He has to preach a few times each week. He needs wisdom to deal with teenagers and their problems and parents and their problems. He has to plan and prepare for upcoming activities and events. He has to fulfill any other duties that might fall under his job description (like building maintenance, hospital visits, etc.) Plus he has to be the husband and bear the spiritual responsibility of that, perhaps a father depending on your family. Not to even mention the other things he is responsible for. And he has to do ALL of that being the happy, fun, spiritual guy that everyone expects him to be. That's a lot!

{Now that my husband is working a secular job and serving in ministry as a volunteer, he still has some big responsibilities. He works with mostly unsaved people. He manages multiple employees. He completes major projects under strict and rapid deadlines. He gives important presentations in front of presidents and customers. He bares weighty responsibility at his company, and he certainly needs prayer!}

2. Encourage him.

Like we just said, your sweet husband has a lot on his plate. Sometimes his work can be difficult or discouraging. A lot of guys identify heavily with the love language of words of affirmation, meaning you need to encourage him as often as you can. Tell him how much you enjoyed his Sunday School lesson, or what you learned from his sermon, or how excited a teenager was to spend time with him, or the great things that the parents said, or just how much you love him, spending time with him, and grateful you are that he works so hard and is such a godly man. Anything that you can say that will encourage your husband is what you need to say. 

I make sure I say these words of encouragement at the same time as holding his hand or squeezing his hand, or giving him a hug, or with a hand on his shoulder. These two love languages combined (words of affirmation & physical touch) speak volumes to my husband and they are what he needs. 

3. Don't complain. 

Living in Small Town, South, and adjusting to all its insane changes have been really hard for me. Although I haven't always done the best at this, I'm going to throw it out there anyway.... Don't complain. It's only going to make him feel bad about the decisions that he has made about being there, and he will feel like he isn't doing enough to make you happy. It will only discourage him. 

{We don't live in Small Town, South, anymore, and I have far fewer daily "challenges"… but it is still absolutely necessary that I do not complain about the now "little things" to my husband.}

4. Look good for him.

So it can be tempting to wake up in the morning, get wrapped up in your to-do list, and pretty much look the same at the end of the day... Sloppy and messy and not in top form... And when your husband comes home, he does notice. But he will appreciate it more if you fix your hair, do a little light makeup, and spray some perfume. Oh, and change out of the pajamas. I want my husband to come home at the end of the day and think that I am the most beautiful woman in the world. I also want to do what I can to help him come to that conclusion. 

5. Take an interest in the teens.

At church and youth activities, be involved with the activities. Be as interested in the people your husband works with as he is. Talk with them. Ask about their lives. Be interested the things that they are interested in. This isn't just your husband's job. Youth ministry is your job as well. 

{Or whatever ministry you are in. Or his job, or his important hobbies, or whatever is important to him.}

6. Take care of your responsibilities.

On a daily basis, keep up with the things that your husband expects you to do. Keeping the house clean, making the bed, doing the laundry & ironing clothes, paying the bills, washing the dishes (my least favorite!). I don't know what your husband expects you to do, but do it! He works hard every day, possibly with difficult individuals. Don't make him work on you too! 

Do what you need to do to help your husband. Every man is different. The things that I do to help my husband might not help your husband at all. But one thing is for sure, ladies, they need our help!  

Photo Courtesy: http://www.wallpaper4me.com/wallpaper/Heart-Love-In-Script/